- Office of Management and Budget Director Joshua Bolten, asked for a specific memory of his former colleague, Supreme Court nominee Harriet Miers; quoted in the New York Times, Oct. 16

I'm sorry I couldn't make the message-of-the-day meeting. It's just been one crisis after another this week. Aside from Iraq, Hurricane Wilma, oil prices, the Fed nomination, keeping Harriet on script during her Hill visits and BlackBerrying with my lawyers about you-know-what-and-whom (that Fitzgerald guy better keep his mitts off my BlackBerry), I just spent the morning reviewing the White House bowling records at the request of our esteemed colleagues at the Senate Judiciary Committee after Bolten opened the door. (Thanks, Josh!)

My quick assessment: Harriet's average of 153 is plenty good for the president. He and Harriet bowl together regularly, and he respects her game. But that's not good enough for some of our base. As you've heard, George Will has sniffed that 153 is good for an administrative law judge, but “hardly adequate” for a Supreme Court justice. As if Will would know: when's the last time he graced a bowling alley? The only strike he's ever seen is the kind called by a Major League umpire. Still, he's got other elitists in the party all riled up. Some are even sponsoring Web sites urging Harriet to withdraw, with oh-so-clever names like “SparethePresident.org.”

It's time for a preemptive strike. We could play the sexism card, but the First Lady already tried that without much luck. It doesn't help that Clinton-appointee Ruth Bader Ginsburg anchors the Supreme Court team with a blistering average of 214. Talk about a small woman getting a lot of pin action!

To make matters worse, James Carville is still yakking about the 1995 game when Sandra Day O'Connor nailed a near-impossible 7-10 split to put the Supremes over the Clinton Cabineteers for the Government All-Agency League title. (The justices' win was especially impressive given that Souter kept tripping over his robe and throwing gutter balls.)

We're also getting hammered by the social conservatives on this one. They like that Harriet prays at the start of every frame. What bothers them is her style. First, there's the fact that her ball used to drift a little to the left until a few years ago. (She failed to disclose that on her White House questionnaire, which has Specter making ominous noises about hitting the reset button and asking her to re-do it once again.) Now she tends to roll a flat ball right down the middle of the lane, often ending up with a split. That's not good. We can try arguing that she's is a straight-shooter (literally), but the National Review & co. want another Scalia - someone whose powerful right hook sends the wood flying.

So here's my recommendation: Yank Harriet out of the practice-session “murder boards” - we all know she's not actually going to answer any of the senators' questions, anyway - and get her back into those size 6 bowling shoes. Pronto. I'd say she needs to get her average up to at least 165 by the start of the Senate Judiciary hearings. I've lined up a pro to help raise her score and teach her how to put some right-spin on the ball. It'll take a lot of hard work on Harriet's part, but (Lord knows) no one's ever accused her of being lazy.

At the same time, we need to highlight Harriet's strengths and accomplishments. The president has played horse shoes with Harriet on his ranch, and he says she tosses ringers like nobody's business! I think it's time we share that information with the media and the base.

Plan B. If all this fails, I've done some outside-the-lane thinking about a possible Miers replacement. How about Libby? He's smart, tough, a fine lawyer, a good athlete - and the president really likes his nickname. Justice Scooter! Think about it. I have reason to believe he might be looking to make a move soon.

If you want to discuss any of this further, I'll be at the W.H. bowling alley, practicing my backspin. Something tells me I'm going to need to be at the top of my game . . . . .